Working From Home & It's Woes
Working from home seems so glorious to some. Okay, okay, to MOST. That of course, is usually the thought process to those who currently don’t work from home or never have. <insert outrageous number of gasps from the ever so offended society we live in> Oops.
Before you close the tab and unsubscribe (for me merely sharing my personal experience) hear me out on this ….
There are only a select few in this large world who KNOW me and know me well…
(small circle, less drama. ya feel me?)
….But those who DON’T know me well get a glimpse of my life through my social media platforms. They see my day to day InstaStory. They see my motivational/inspirational posts. They see my “perfect” little family, my “well behaved” son and my weekly (sometimes daily) trips to various coffee shops. They see the “freedom” that I have being a work from home mom (excuse me while I LAUGH OUT LOUD) whether it be getting groceries at 11 am on a Wednesday morning or going to the gym at a later than usual time on a Tuesday… Or simply just chilling on my couch in my PJ’s at 2p.m on a Friday working from my computer doing my weekly client meal plans. These things that you see in my stories, my posts…that’s what we call a HIGHLIGHT REEL. Read that again…
You see…As transparent and real as I aim to be on my social media outlets, I find that even I sometimes will document just the HIGHLIGHTS of my day. I mean, those are the parts of life we want others to actually see, right? The good moments? The easy going days. The “LIFE” so people say I have. I get it….Seeing someone’s highlight reel can trigger quite a few emotions. Jealousy…resentment…frustration…envy…just to name a few.
Because of this (the tendency to display only a highlight reel), others feel bitter towards someone like me. And yes, I speak from experience. I’ve lost many a friends for this very reason. And that’s okay… I’ve learned people will only see what they want to see when their heart is conflicted…
But if you KNOW me…and have KNOWN me…You know that being a stay at home/work from home mom was NEVER apart of MY plan. Lean in…..
I’ve worked SOME kind of job since I was legally able to. When I was FINALLY able to get a workers permit, I got it. And before that I did all the “under the table” jobs… babysitting, cleaning up yards, making crafts/things to sell. I’ve ALWAYS had an EARN MY WAY mentality. I will be forever grateful to my parents for raising me this way. They are the real MVP’s. But seriously, I am a go getter by design. My first real job, I was an activity assistant in a nursing home. I found so much value from this job. Caring for the elderly and their well being early on is where I attribute my ability to truly empathize with people. This job allowed me to form connections with people on a whole new level (at the young age of 15) that I fully believe is where my passion for simply wanting to HELP people developed. I stuck with this job for 5 1/2 years and loved every moment of it. I worked late nights and weekend after weekend, saving up most of my income. I kept this job all through college- the whole ONE year that I went. Let me explain…
If you didn’t know, I went to UNC Chapel Hill for Dental Assisting. These programs are typically only a year in length but are VERY intense. I loved every minute of it. I graduated high school mid June 2010 and started my college studies in early July 2010. While all my “friends” were partaking in senior week and enjoying the last summer before heading off to college or moving away, I had a mere two week break between high school and college. Not only that, but I didn’t get the typical experience of moving away for college- and please note, in no way am I salty about that! The fact that my mom and dad allowed me to live at home (rent free), save the money I earned AND paid for me to go to school, was reason enough for me to feel the highest level of gratitude. – And mom/dad if you’re reading this, I’ll never be able to say this enough but THANK YOU.
I commuted 30 minutes to school everyday. I rode the bus from the park and ride to campus and attended class Monday – Friday’s all whilst continuing to work my nursing home job nights and weekends. I was doing just what I had planned I would do. I was going to college for what I had always dreamed of being – a dental assistant. From the age of 13 I knew this was what I wanted to do…I thought it was my calling.
After graduating college and landing a job right out of school, I felt unstoppable. Not only was I working a full time job, I kept my part time nursing home job AND picked up a retail job at Ulta! What…Why?!
I had this crazy goal to buy a house by the age of 20 and I was going to do whatever it took to make that goal a reality. My parents always taught me the value of saving my money…(thanks again mom and dad) and within 12 months of working 3 jobs, I saved a little over $10k. Quite the hefty down payment for a first time home buyer, wouldn’t you agree? I was proud...
Oh…But I forgot to add one teeny important detail.. Three months after landing that first job as a DA, I was let go. Yep… it happened. And honestly, I look back now and totally know why. I will easily admit that I’m was a bit headstrong (okay I still am) and back then, I was a very quick to rebuttal anyone who tried to critique me or tell me I was wrong. (thankfully I can say I’m MUCH better at taking criticism nowadays). .
I was young..new to the “professional world”. And keep in mind, my job of playing board games with the elderly as a teenager wasn’t quite the job to prepare me for working in a dental office along side seasoned dental world peeps. I had ALOT to learn…I digress...
But God never fails and within a month of being let go, I was accepted to my “dream job”. A pediatric & orthodontic office where I spent the next four years working, learning and perfecting my trade. If you have heard my story via YouTube or Podcast, you know that though I was doing a job I enjoyed and pursing the career I loved…the atmosphere was not healthy for me…and when it came time for me to decide whether I was going to go back to work after having my son OR stay at home to raise him myself, my husband and I knew without a doubt that staying home was the best option for me at the time.
You see, staying home..working from home…WAS NEVER IN MY PLANS. I never had the desire to be a stay at home mom. I never wanted to give up my steady income or career…my security. And as I have stated in many podcasts/videos, I LOST MYSELF when I gave up the job I worked so hard to obtain…when I assumed my new roles of mom/wife/homemaker. As someone who had ALWAYS earned her keep, I viewed quitting my job and losing my income as a weakness. And I shut down…..
But through my weight loss journey…through finding keto…through finding my love for fitness…I fully believe I found my TRUE calling…I’ve found my true PASSION.. and I also fully believe in divine intervention. I am so thankful I lost myself amidst the weight gain, career loss and depression as it has allowed me to find who I was destined to be.
And I say ALL of this in hope that to those of you who look at my life and think I have it “made” as a work from home individual… This career path was never in MY plans. I didn’t set out to own my own business and surely don’t have nearly the experience that is required to do so BUT I am grateful for the opportunity to learn a new trade. I’m thankful for the ability to educate myself and gain new certifications that allow me to do this crazy entrepreneur thing. Understand this: It ain’t easy, y’all! (sorry not sorry for the pour southern grammar and twang) but it’s the God’s honest truth!
Working for yourself is HARD. Working from home is HARD. You spend countless hours doing what you love BUT you can NEVER escape it. Entrepreneurship has no closing hours. You don’t get to leave work AT work when 5 p.m hits. You can’t shut down for the weekend and pick back up Monday. Vacations aren’t “normal” vacations. I mean seriously, I just bought the Wifi package for my family cruise in April because my job requires it. There is no FULLY disconnecting on the day to day grind of being a #girlboss. And that for me, that is okay. Because I’m learning everyday how to time manage better…I’m learning how to balance tech time and family time more efficiently. And I am also learning that the dirty dishes in the sink CAN wait until after I check in with my clients. (This is a true struggle for me as I am SO type A and OCD about clean house; sigh)
Working from home has it’s benefits, absolutely. I am blessed to be able to earn my income as well as be present in my son’s life as he grows. I am honored that so many people make this life possible and I would not be able to do this without my followers and clients.
BUT like Gwen Stefani said, DON’T GET IT TWISTED. You only see the highlight reel of my life (most of the time) though I try to be as transparent in my day to day as possible. But often (especially lately) you’ll see me working from home with a sick child wearing yesterday’s hair/make up OR you’ll hear about me having to cancel Podcast after Podcast because play school was closed OR you may catch me working at a coffee shop on my days where I DO have reliable childcare because being at home 24/7 can sometimes drive you bonkers. Work from home life has its benefits, no doubt. But don’t judge someone by their highlight reel… even me 🙂